the proper response to brokenness?
being ripped open; that the very thing that allows you to love is unable to do
its job properly. In me, brokenness can cause withdrawal
because it’s easier
for me to run away from the pain. But to be changed by my brokenness, don’t I have to in some wayembrace it, own it?
the plight of a fatherless generation, a whole generation of orphans due to the
AIDS pandemic. But soon I’ll step on an
airplane and 20 hours of flying time later, I’ll suddenly find myself detached from
the situation here in Swaziland. So what do I do with that? How do I allow the brokenness to shape who I
am, but at the same time not let it lead to despair and hopelessness?
brokenness. It is not mine to
“fix.” The truth is that the brokenness
remains. Hurt people hurt people. So where is God’s promise of redemption
here? God is a God who redeems and God
fulfills all His promises. Yes, He is
faithful and true…I can state all these things. I can even fully believe them to be true – which I do. But how hard is it to look death, pain,
destruction, loneliness, and abandonment in the eyes and
say these things. I don’t know where this leaves me. I know coming into a trip like this that it’snot at all about what we “do” here – but instead how God changes our hearts in
the process. So how has my heart
changed? How does this shape who I am?
I just picked up this book I’ve been reading titled Life of
the Beloved by Henri Nouwen. It’s
interesting the title of the chapter I find my bookmark on…Brokenness. Hmm. I
smiled and thought “good one, God”,
then decided to check out what Henri had to say about brokenness.
Here are some of Henri’s thoughts that I thought were worthy of pondering.
Shattered glass shines more than
unbroken glass. Embracing our brokenness
and bringing it into the light of the One who calls us the Beloved can make our
brokenness shine like a diamond.
Our brokenness reveals something about who we are. Our sufferings and pains are not simply
bothersome interruptions of our lives; rather, they touch us in our uniqueness
and our most intimate individuality. The
way I’m broken tells you something unique about me.
Embrace the brokenness. Take it in. Feel it. Let it change you. Choose not to run away from the pain, but
trust that you have the strength to stand in it.
When we keep listening to the voice calling us the Beloved, it becomes possible
to live our brokenness, not as a confirmation of our fear that we are
worthless, but as an opportunity to purify and deepen the blessing that rests
upon us.
And so the great task becomes that
of allowing the blessing to touch us in our brokenness. Then our brokenness will gradually come to be
seen as an opening toward the full acceptance of ourselves as the Beloved. This explains why true joy can be experienced
in the midst of great suffering.
