27 June 2008

Today I came face to face with pain, rejection, abandonment,
loneliness, and hopelessness. It’s my
first visit to Mbabane
Government Hospital
as Dennis and I went to do some setup so our team could come visit. 

At the end of the children’s ward – in a room
not fit for hospital patients – was the abandoned babies room. Many were mentally & physically
disabled. The phrase “people only go to the hospital to
die” rings through my head. Even amidst the brightly painted walls of cartoon
characters – there was a feeling of despair in this place. Worried mothers keeping vigil over their sick
children. I physically feel the weight
of the pain filling these rooms. Many of
the abandoned babies will never leave. Several of the handicapped kids are now teenagers. They don’t need to remain in the hospital for
medical care – but they’ll remain here because they’re abandoned – there’s
nowhere for them to go.

It’s so hard to see God’s plan in this situation. I’m certain this is not His will. But I trust the Lord. He’s led our path to this place – to go and
love these kids. We’ll embrace them with
the Father’s love the best we know how.

All these tough situations that our team is walking into has
me thinking. Here they are thousands of
miles away from home experiencing

things they could never be prepared for…like
when the reality of AIDS and death hits them head on. What’s our response? Questions swim through my head…How can I
willingly take these 18 lives entrusted to me into a situation that I know will
crush them and affect them for the rest of their lives? Somehow I trust that this is God’s will. For them to see and feel brokenness and pain,
to glorify God in the midst of it, to offer hope to a hopeless situation. How do I comfort their broken hearts? How do I process things for myself much less
help them process? The only thing I can
do is to depend on the Lord for strength and wisdom, and I’ll try my best to carry
them to the Father.